


cherry blossoms were most beautiful when they withered

by clementiine



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: Cancer, Character Death, Gen, Komahina - Freeform, M/M, Sad stuff boys, not so long but yeehaw, this was supposed to be a short request i got but i spiraled out of control and
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-25
Updated: 2019-03-25
Packaged: 2019-12-07 08:35:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18232469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clementiine/pseuds/clementiine
Summary: Komaeda's mind is lost in a swirl of thoughts and memories, and Hinata can only cry by his side.





	cherry blossoms were most beautiful when they withered

“Don’t leave me..”   
  


The light is a little harsh on his eyes, but he knows it’s quite beautiful outside. It’s sunny for the first time in months, and the light filtering into the room likely gives it a soft glow. He hums, not looking at the man beside him, opting to stare out the window instead. 

 

What little he’s able to see  _ is _ beautiful, the way the flowers bloom and the grass surrounding it bright, fresh. It reminds him of a place long forgotten, a place that he once thought beautiful (though beautiful it turned out to be not.) 

 

It’s the first time it’s been sunny in months, months, months...he idly recalls the reason for that -- it was spring, wasn’t it? Summer? No, he was quite sure April fell in spring and not the latter. It was April, and there came the feeling that there was something important about April -- something he shouldn’t have forgotten, something, something, something….

 

“Nagito -- look at me,  _ please. _ ”

 

He turns his head, though the movement’s restricted by fatigue. Or was it fatigue? He felt quite tired, yes, but wasn’t that how he felt all the time? Perhaps he was weak. Maybe he’d be allowed to go outside for once and exercise a bit. 

 

His nose wrinkles in distaste at the thought, though he knows it’s needed with how frail he was. He could go jogging with, with...what was her name? Always so active, and athletic. Her appetite could never be matched, though, and the thought makes him giggle a bit.

 

He looks up, and he’s met with two concerned mismatched eyes staring at him. Dimly, he wonders why they’re tear-filled, why the owner is clutching his hand tightly. He reaches up with his free hand to brush the droplets away, tilting his head, confused. Oh, this was, this was...Hinata-kun! Hinata-kun, Hinata-kun...the sun, warm and bright and hurting his heart a little just as the sun outside was doing so to his eyes.

 

“Hinata-kun..? Why are you crying? Do you prefer winter? It’s cold, but it _is_ beautiful...soft, and gentle. I love spring...haruuu..” 

 

His voice is soft, but the expression on Hinata’s face makes it seem like he’s said something cruel to him, or yelled too loudly, like he’s been slapped. Vaguely he registers that he doesn’t like that expression on his face at all, he prefers the times when he laughs, when his smile is far too bright for him to handle, or when his face scrunches up, red, acting almost in a tsundere fashion. “Tsun..ahah, Hinata-kun, you remind me of one of those characters, hnm?”

 

From where did those memories come from, though? He can’t recall the past months, only bits and pieces, and only the vivid memories of this month are present. Each one, each day spent in a small little room, with nothing to accompany him but the beeping of a monitor...or was someone else there too? It’s beeping now, though it’s not as quick nor loud as it used to be, it’s slow, slow and muffled by someone talking, by -- ah, isn’t that Hinata’s voice? 

 

“Sorry...Hinata-kun, I went off track--”

 

“Hajim e..i-it’s Hajime, remember?” He looks at him fully, and he sees Hinata trying so desperately not to cry. It makes him frown, seeing him upset. “Hajime? Ah, but when did I ever get that right? That’s much too informal, too-too  _ personal _ , and too intimate for someone like him. It’s a shock to hear him say this, because, _because!_

 

He’s aware he’s always longed to use his first name, to be close to him, and he’s aware of a gentle feeling in his heart when he sees him. It’s the one thing he can’t forget, apparently, because he’s constantly reminded he’s so, so forgetful, so..

 

“You can use Hajime, Nagito. You-you’re very dear to me. You’re very close to me.” His eyes grow slightly, and he manages to look awake now, rather than half-asleep. He was dear...to Hinata...to  _ Hajime.  _ A smile makes its way across his face, cheeks reddening along with it. “Hajime is...Hajime is very dear to me, too. I love Hajime, actually. From the bottom of my heart, I love him…more than anyone else, I wish to-I want to be with you.” A small hiccup escapes Hajime’s lips. 

 

It takes him a while to reply, he notes. Was he too forward? Too honest? Hajime is still holding his hand, though, and he’s holding it tighter than before, and this makes him think that maybe his answer was just enough. Not perfect, but enough. “I-I know. I love you too. That’s why -- that’s why you can’t leave me, okay? You won’t -- not today, not ever…”

 

“Hajime? Could we go out tomorrow? It’s so lovely outside. I think we might see the cherry blossoms soon. Perhaps we could even stay out long enough to see them wither. They’re the most beautiful at that time, aren’t they? And they’ll have flower rafts...oh, Hajime. It’s april isn’t it?” There’s no response, and he attempts to sit up, to look at him properly -- but ah, his weak, frail body. It’s no use, so he slinks back down.

 

“...Hajime?”

  
  
“I’m-I’m here. I’ll always be here.” Hajime twists a ring over and over on his finger, and he notes how pretty it is, though he remembers, he remembers -- ah, didn’t he have one like that? Surely he did, it looked so familiar. Or maybe he bought it for him, perhaps that was what happened. His memory has been awful, and it’s awful still, and try as he might he can’t force himself to be any better. 

 

He needed sleep, he thought, sleep, and exercise, and better food, maybe. He did his best to eat all he was given, because he didn’t want to disappoint the nurse, with her mousy personality, and, and what was her name?

 

“Oh...it’s April, my birthday is coming up, then!” He feels a spark of joy -- so  _ that _ was what he kept forgetting, wasn’t it? The important detail, what he was supposed to remember. Pride fills him, and perhaps he was right -- all he needed was rest, exercise, and food, and perhaps a little bit of...ah, but luck wasn’t that pleasant wasn’t it? 

 

He knew it made his life...the way it was. It made him, and it made others cry, shaking their bodies with sobs, sobs he swore he could almost hear in the room now...but that was foolish, of course, there wasn’t any reason why anyone would be crying at the moment.

 

“Nagito -- I love you, I do so much -- and you’re right. Your birthday  _ is _ coming up, and it’s even t --” Hajime stops short, and he’s not sure why there’s panic on his face. Concern pangs dully within him, but perhaps it’s just him worrying over getting him a present, which, in that case, he couldn’t care less, because to him, Hajime was the only gift he needed. 

 

“I don’t need a gift, Hajime… you are already enough.” Raspy laughter escapes his throat, quickly  turning into a coughing fit, and then he’s being worried over..

 

“That was quite cheesy, wasn’t it? But it’s true, because I love you, and you’re enough. You always have been, and you always have been there for -- for me.. I’m a little upset we couldn’t -- couldn’t spend time out today, but perhaps tomorrow -- and maybe dinner together, and the sunset...but really, anything is fine with you. I love you, Hajime. I love you..from the bottom of my heart...and I’m so  _ lucky _ to have met you...and...” 

 

He drifts off, humming in tune to the beeps in the room, though they become slower, muffled by the yelling, the frantic speech. They become slower, and slower, and slower still…

 

The doors slam open, but the beeps have ceased now, and so has Komaeda’s humming.

 

Cherry blossoms were most beautiful when they withered away, and moreseo when they fell.

**Author's Note:**

> heh whhehejk oghghogooghooooo so anyway im in fucking tears! yeehaw! this isn't the best writign and it was supposed to be just..small angst prompt but........... y e ahh. thank you ollie for beta reading!!! ily bicth


End file.
